Read, Read, Read!

“Read, read, read. Read everything—trash, classics, good and bad, and see how they do it. Just like a carpenter who works as an apprentice and studies the master. Read! You’ll absorb it. Then write. If it’s good, you’ll find out. If it’s not, throw it out of the window.”
–William Faulkner, American Novelist

Do Animals Talk?

Of course they do.
They say (or sign) things like—I’m hungry. Hey, great stash of food over here. Macadamia nuts—Suweeet! Mommmmy!! Get off me. Scary predator rustling at 3 o’clock. OMG It’s a RBAL (A Really Big Ass Lion). Where have you been all night? I’m lonely. MOMMMMMY!! Hey, buddy, you’re doing a crappy job of tending these eggs—go find another fire coral. You’re cute. Wanna hook up?
How else would they survive?
It’s not about projecting “human characteristics” onto other beings; after all, we are animals, too, and we especially resemble those that travel in pairs, or packs, or schools, or herds. It seems that Tweets and texts are particularly similar to the staccato chatter exchanged among the rest of the animal kingdom.
And, no matter how you parse it, it’s pretentious of humans to assume we’ve got a lock on communication and connections, on wants and needs. I doubt we are the only creatures on this Earth to say “I love you.”

Love, Mommy

I bought a Scholastic Children’s Dictionary at a used-book store the other day. My daughter was turning eight, and I wanted her to have the joy of seeking and discovering new words. What I didn’t see, inside the front cover, was that it was already inscribed:

“Bethany, Everything you learn will help you achieve all life has to offer,” Love, Mommy.

The date was 2002, just eight years ago. My stomach grew tight. Eight years from now, will my child sell this book to another used bookstore? So quickly outgrown and discarded.

Or will I?

The Electronic Hangover

Do you remember when e-mail used to be fun?

Little notes exchanged. Thoughtful moments. ‘Hellos’ from afar.

Then, this once-new mode of communication was co-opted—like regular mail and telephone (think direct-mail ads and telemarketers and robocalls)—by the powers that be, the powers that want to be, and commercial profit-seekers who want more of you.

Your money. Your vote. Your time. Your attention. Your money.

Watch out texters and Facebookers. The “business” of crowding out our private moments, interrupting our personal space, and overwhelming us with worthless static and “ca-ching” chatter is on the way.

Happy Anarchy will be co-opted once again.